Food Diary of Doom

25 lbs. total for 2003.

Yay me!

Day Something

This is Week Four. I'm not weighing myself until much later in the game, and I'm also not taking measurements. I find a 1/4 inch reduction to not quite be the motivation I need. The diet is easy to stick to, I'm really enjoying it actually.

The hard part, as always, is exercising. I just can't seem to get my ass in gear. It's not like I need a lot of time to do it, but I've started reading a lot lately... and I can't read and exercise at teh same time.

I've decided that I'm going to try just dancing around for a little while every night and see if that helps at all. It'll be like aerobics, but not structured. And then maybe I'll do some sit-ups and push-ups or lift some weights.

Here's to continued success!

Day Eight

Finished out week one strong - down 5 lbs.

I have no idea if I'm in lipolysis or not, but I'm sure to be headed there at least.

I've stayed under 20 grams of carbs every day, and I haven't been hungry or had really strong cravings. When I did, I ate an Atkins candy bar and I was fine. That was five days ago.

Exercising wil come eventually, I think, because I've got more energy than before, and I'm already finding a desire to be more active.

I hope it lasts!

Day One - Lunchtime

Two meals down, one to go.

I'm taking three of the Atkins "Core 4" vitamens and supplements to aid in my diet. We'll see how that goes.

Last night, the husband and I cleaned out the refrigerator and went grocery shopping. I'll be living on eggs, meat and lettuce for a while.

I really need to get up on the ol'exercise though. Thirty minutes, five days a week. One sitcom's worth of exercise. It can be done.

All of the last week my goal was to drink a gallon of water every day and give up caffiene by the end of the week.

I succeeded in both endeavors.

I also started to look at foods and tried to identify them as Carbs and Proteins. That's proving to be kind of difficult because as I really being studying labels, it's become clear to me that a lot of things I thought of as "safe" are ridiculously high in sugar. Could I be indentifying one of the pieces to this weight puzzle? I hope so.

The goals this week are to build a menu for next week, clean out my cupboards, and start a more consistent exercise program.

Thinking about being fat...

I didn't have to cry to get my husband on board. He thought about it and decided that he'd do Atkins along with me, cook me food, exercise with me, do whatever it takes to make this work. He means it, too, because he said it out of nowhere last night - which means he had been thinking about it all day. He's a good one, that's for sure.

I've been trying to think about why I'm fat. What makes me fat? I eat really well, low in calories, lots of veggies, not a lot of fats... I'm not as active as I used to be, but I've remedied that this year (and at other times), and I'm not seeing any changes. My waist size is the same as it's been for the last three years. I've come to the conclusion that I really am fat. I'm obese. I have a weight PROBLEM. I am one of those people that has to take drastic steps to achieve a healthy body. Baby steps won't work - don't work - for me. What makes it hard is that I've been doing everything right and the weight is still here - and no one believes me. It's almost like because I'm fat, peopel (doctors included) think I must eat nothing but Twinkies and beef lard. I don't. I eat a VERY balanced diet. I don't think I get more than 2000 calories on any given day, and on most days it's probably closer to 1200. I could absolutely be more consistent in my exercise - but even when I was, the weight kept coming.

Something in the puzzle of me and food and exercise doesn't fit. I hope that Atkins can help me figure it out.

The Devil Made Me Do It

Saturday I bought the Atkins' book and I read it. Or was that Sunday? Sunday.

I read it and I'm thinking that maybe I can do it.

Maybe I can take control of my weight and health. I've given myself a target start date of 7.21.03.

The hard part? Getting my husband on board. Exercising. Giving up caffinated coffee. I've sort of done the last one. I was already down to one cup of regular coffee a day (down from a pot a day a year ago), so I figured this would be an easy first step. Maybe. Do you realize how hard it is to get decent decaf? Like, a good & tasty decaf? Tully's makes one - it;sthe House Blend and it's just less bitter than the regular. So, one down, a thousand to go.

Things I need to do to get ready include, but aren't limited to:

- Cleaning out my cupboards.
- Cleaning out my refrigerator.
- Saving money for groceries to restock pantry with acceptable foods.
- Getting up earlier in the morning for breakfast.
- Drinking eight 8 ounce glasses of a water a day.
- Exercising at least 30 minutes a day, five days a week.
- Find a store that sells low-carb or Atkins Brand stuff.

Anyway, the idea behind the start date is that it's a Monday, it's after my birthday, and it gives me some prep time. The first phase of Atkins is called "Induction" (which sounds a lot like "Indoctrinate" to me) and is supposed to go for a minimum of 2 weeks. I suspect I won't see a lot of changes in that time, but I don't want to get ahead of myself and ruin it by setting up a disappointment before the fact.

I tend to do that. Before I even get started on a new exercise plan or any kind of self-improvement, I predict the failure and don't even bother trying. I know it sounds dumb, but I need my husband to be on board with this for it to succeed. He's going to hate it - he's already grumbling after taking a look at the sample menus. Which is weird because it's all the food he likes. He just doesn't want to be told what he can't eat. For example: Last night after learning that there would be no bread for two weeks (or more), he made a point of eating LOTS of bread and making himself a sandwich for lunch today (he doesn't normally do that). He's contrary, and I know if I cry he'll go along with it. I need to work up some Tears of Manipulation, I guess. I hate doing that. It's so demeaning.